I once made a batch of homemade bread and accidently left out the sugar. Yeast LOVES sugar. Sugar makes the yeast grow and, in turn, the dough rises making for light and crusty bread.
I had the feeling I'd left something out but didn't take the time to review the recipe. After all my bread recipe was in my head. I'd made it tons of times. It was even in our family cookbook with my name next to it.
After mixing everything together and shaping the soft dough into a round ball I placed it back into the mixing bowl and covered it with a clean dish towel.
I always set my dough on top of the dryer letting the warmth of the machine help the dough rise quicker. It usually takes an hour sometimes 2 for the dough to double in size.
I checked it a couple of times before it dawned on me that something was wrong. This bread dough wasn't going anywhere... except to the trashcan!
I decided that it wouldn't hurt to read my bread recipe again. There it was. I had forgotten the sugar. What a waste of time and energy my last bread baking experience had been.
Having had many success didn't mean I didn't need to review the list of ingredients since I wasn't getting the results I expected!Spiritually speaking...
I've experienced a missing ingredient in my life as well. It took a long while for me to return to the recipe, the instructions to make healing possible. I needed what was missing -desperately.
When our daughter Haley and her baby died I never experienced anger at God. I've sincerely never felt that emotion but I've had a broken heart all the same.
I've walked around doing everything as expected.
I've stayed busy, stayed in touch with friends and family, worked hard, and kept saying the right things instead of saying the real things.
I kept trying to bake a healthy life by just repeating what I remembered instead of going back over the recipe for a healthy life.
The scripture that says "happy is he whose trust is in the Lord," found me one day as I was rushing through my way-too-infrequent bible study time. That scripture was what I was missing.
It snagged my heart.
It captured my thoughts.
It became my banner.
That's what was missing. I needed to cry out for help. I needed to tell God I couldn't make it without His help. I needed to acknowledge I hadn't been trusting Him to help me heal His way.
I finally realized not being mad at God wasn't enough. I needed to trust Him with my broken heart even if it never pumped the same again. I needed to let Him nurture me regardless.
I know no other way to regain any measure of true joy. You can't manufacture it. Only God can give it when we commit to trust Him. Trust Him to heal what hurts in your life.
I wish I could say "and she lived happily ever!" Mostly I could. But the truth is - I'm not committed to HAPPY.
I'm committed to the giver of happiness, the giver of peace, the giver of joy: Jesus Christ.